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Pet Hates

AlphinaNovaStar

Energetic
I like dollar tree. I had twenty five dollars on me at the time. I counted about twenty four items and told cashier I doubt I have enough so I choose the index cards not to get. A lady in line gave me a dollar so I can get the index cards. Turns out I think I miscounted the items and only had twenty three even with index cards. I tried to give back the dollar but she told me to keep it.

Is it wrong to find this a pet peeve? I did not ask for help but got it. I am not trying to be ungrateful but I do not want to be a burden.

I do try to pay it forward when I think it will be beneficial to both me and the one I am helping. I guess I find it a bit embarrassing to get help instead of helping someone else.

What do you think?
 

AlphinaNovaStar

Energetic
How come the I Love ... thread isn't growing as equally as this one? Are you forgetting to also express something you love?

:beehive:

:love:
Where is that thread? Too distracted with TV and pillow touching corner of TV to find it. My TV is above my bed so I can watch it from my desk. Found out watching TV from bed would not be watching TV as I will be sleeping. Gotta move that pillow now
 

Faery_Light

Dances with Bees
Contributing Artist
I hate people treating me like I am stupid or like I am deliberately causing them an inconvenience because I'm nearly deaf.

I hate that some online sites like banks or insurance companies do not allow cancelling or closing an account by email or in a chat room so deaf or mute people can do so. They certainly do not mind you starting an account online.

I hate people treating any person with handicaps badly as if they are a nuisance. I’m sure all handicap people would prefer being whole and healthy and it is not their choosing to be otherwise.

I hate people fighting over difference of opinions in politics, religion, child rearing or sexual preference. We all are different and that is what makes the world interesting.

And I really hate when people who think they know so much make hateful statements about adult children who choose to live with a parent or parents. My daughter does so to care for me and so all our finances goes toward having a decent home, pay utilities, pay for medical care and foods. I could not afford to live alone nor am I physically able to do so.

I totally hate for people to mind someone else’s business instead of taking care of their own.

I hate for people to mistreat defenseless animals or to cage them just to be mean.
 

Mythocentric

Extraordinary
Grinch time!



It’s sad to relate but it appears that there are still some parts of Wales where you can be ostracized simply for not being Welsh, a sad fact that I thought had died out long ago! A friend of ours who teaches at our Lucy’s school was down there recently (Carmarthenshire) with her husband touring the area in their camper and decided to stock up on food at one of the shops at a small village near the border with Pembrokeshire. She went in and the man behind the counter talking (in English) to two women, looked across and smiled at her. Until that is, she said good morning at which point they turned away, switched to Cymraeg (Welsh) and ignored her until she left the shop.

Come on you people. What was that all about? The words stupid, ignorant and xenophobic spring readily to mind. As if the world wasn’t in enough trouble already!



Still on the subject of language and buzzwords, which have been on my mind of late. OK! We all use buzzwords, none more so than in the computer world. Many of them have even passed into the English language. But when does a buzzword become a mere stupidity? That all depends on whether you’re a rail fan (or trainspotter if you live in the UK) or not. I recently went down to Preston on a shopping trip with the little one, and while we were waiting for the train (our Lucy loves them) from Lancaster we stood at the end of the platform watching the goings-on. Nearby were two rain fans (trainspotters) loudly discussing the phots and viddies they’d accumulated and I was sorely tempted to cover Lucy’s ears before I realised they were talking about photographs and video’s. Right! I know what a photograph is, even a photo, which is a commonly acceptable (and understood) abbreviation, and I’m entirely familiar with video. But phots and viddies? Try saying them yourself. They’re actually harder to say than photos and video.

So, at what point does a buzzword, which is generally used to identify yourself as belonging to a specific group become a stupidity which only serves only to corrupt a language (any language!) which has been evolving for thousands of years?



OK! Rant over and I’m heading over to Lisa’s ‘I Love’ thread as soon as I kill this Grinch!*



*Oops! Sorry! I mean terminate the designated subject with extreme prejudice!
 

tparo

Engaged
QAV-BEE
Sorry but to me that does seem ungrateful.


I don't think AlphinaNovaStar was trying to be ungrateful in any way, the gift was a kind gesture but when it was unneeded the refusal to take it back could be seen to show that the lady was looking down upon Alphina, as it made Alphina feel that she was almost begging when she was not, sometimes generous offers are not always made with a generous sentiment.
 

Satira Capriccio

Renowned
CV-BEE
Contributing Artist
Borrowing or lending and giving or receiving certainly can be a minefield.

While someone might feel belittled when a stranger gives them money to complete a purchase, it doesn't mean the stranger intended to belittle the person.

If I were to give someone money to complete their purchase, I'd think of it as a gift, not charity. I've been in the situation before where I didn't have enough money to complete a purchase and had to put something back. I'd not think bad of another person caught in the same situation. If I had the money, why not help someone out of a situation I'd once been in? Perhaps, someone did help me ... so now I have the opportunity to pay it forward.

Either way ... gift or charity ... once given, the money no longer belongs to me. So, I'd probably say keep it too ... even if that person discovered they actually did have enough money to complete their purchase.


Alphina, your stranger could have been paying it forward herself just as you do ... so you could have been helping her after all. How cool is that?

You're not ungrateful because you attempted to give the money back. Giving the money back when you found you didn't need it was the right thing to do.
 

tparo

Engaged
QAV-BEE
Borrowing or lending and giving or receiving certainly can be a minefield.

While someone might feel belittled when a stranger gives them money to complete a purchase, it doesn't mean the stranger intended to belittle the person.

If I were to give someone money to complete their purchase, I'd think of it as a gift, not charity. I've been in the situation before where I didn't have enough money to complete a purchase and had to put something back. I'd not think bad of another person caught in the same situation. If I had the money, why not help someone out of a situation I'd once been in? Perhaps, someone did help me ... so now I have the opportunity to pay it forward.

Either way ... gift or charity ... once given, the money no longer belongs to me. So, I'd probably say keep it too ... even if that person discovered they actually did have enough money to complete their purchase.


Alphina, your stranger could have been paying it forward herself just as you do ... so you could have been helping her after all. How cool is that?

You're not ungrateful because you attempted to give the money back. Giving the money back when you found you didn't need it was the right thing to do.

I do agree completely with every thing you said, but the refusal to take the money back made Alphina feel bad so I did wonder if it was possible done with a slightly condescending tone.
 

Pendraia

Sage
Contributing Artist
Thanks Bonnie...I love working with my kids. Sometimes the politics of working in a school is extremely frustrating but I would miss working with the kids if I stopped.
Mytho, that is really sad...I had Wales on my list of places I'd like to visit.

Helping people is one of those funny things that it is really hard to get right sometimes.

And people's motivation for helping is not always pure. I'm a helper, can't help myself(sorry for the pun) but I can't. If I see someone who needs help I often try to help(unless my instincts kick in and say don't you might put yourself in danger there).

That said if someone didn't need the help and offered the money back I would take it. I'd probably say something like, 'Are you sure?' but I wouldn't force them to accept my help. Having many years ago been a single mum for 8 years I know how tough life can get and know that it was made easier for me by others who often did something kind at the right moment. An example of this is a friend who every year used to buy me a mother's day present from my son.

I think I do it partly to pass on things that I've had done for me and partly because, hey we're all part of the human race and just a smile and comment can often help someone through a rough patch or make them feel less invisible. We all have rough times that we've been through it's part of life and sometimes we're not aware enough about how the people around us are feeling until too late. I had a very good friend(part of my quilting group) who committed suicide and I regret everyday that I didn't realise how bad she was feeling at the time. She was very good at covering it up, but I still feel like I should have been there.
 

Mythocentric

Extraordinary
You should keep Wales on your list Pen! It's a beautiful country with a rich and fascinating history. And I would hasten to add populated by helpful and friendly people. Anachronisms like the above are fortunately very few and far between these days and should not be allowed to taint anyone's view or detract from a place so rich in a wide range of beauty both natural and man-made!
 

Pendraia

Sage
Contributing Artist
Good to hear that Mytho...I would like to go to Wales and Ireland and Scotland. Would also like to go back and revisit the north of England and Western Super Mare where Mum and Dad met. I can dream...; )
 

Mythocentric

Extraordinary
Scotland and Wales for sure! Much as I love England and though I live within sight (and only a 30 minute drive away) from the Lake District, I've got to admit that Wales and Scotland have the best of it when it comes to wild scenery. I've spent some of the finest holidays of my life on Anglesey to the south and the Mull of Galloway and Isle's of Skye and Islay to the north. I'd also throw Cornwall and Ireland into the mix. I've just realised that they are all places related to the Celts, which goes to show they probably knew something we don't!
 

JOdel

Dances with Bees
HW Honey Bear
Diana Wynne Jones's last book (completed by her younger sister) 'The Islands of Chaldea' is a very thinly disguised travelog of the British islands. Although I gather that her version of Wales is a lot sunnier than the one that most people encounter.
 
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