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Getting used to new habits for Coronavirus....

Hornet3d

Wise
That statement made me look up some marriage stats in the US. The average marriage lasts 8 years. 70% of women initiate divorce proceedings.

The rate in the UK trend has changed in the last 25 years, the rates for marriages ending in divorce in the first ten years has remained roughly the same at 20% but the marriages ending in divorce after 20 years has risen from 25% to 35% and after 35 years up from around 29% to close to 45%. What that says about modern life I am really not sure.
 

unreal

Noteworthy
The rate in the UK trend has changed in the last 25 years, the rates for marriages ending in divorce in the first ten years has remained roughly the same at 20% but the marriages ending in divorce after 20 years has risen from 25% to 35% and after 35 years up from around 29% to close to 45%. What that says about modern life I am really not sure.
It's the only life we have, in any case.

Probably some effort into making it a good one would not be misdirected.

For some weird reason, I'm flashing on Marvin (the robot) in HHGTG (old bbc tv version) and his view on life.
 

unreal

Noteworthy
71 years. I think that entitles them to have an *informed* opinion on the subject of marriage. In fact, I think once you've been on the planet that long, you are more than entitled to an informed opinion on pretty much anything. I'll defer mine, until I hit that age. Up until then, my only excuse is "cut me some slack. I've never been this old before."
 

eclark1894

Visionary
71 years. I think that entitles them to have an *informed* opinion on the subject of marriage. In fact, I think once you've been on the planet that long, you are more than entitled to an informed opinion on pretty much anything. I'll defer mine, until I hit that age. Up until then, my only excuse is "cut me some slack. I've never been this old before."
It's not that I disagree with you. I do believed that they're *very* informed on marriage. However, all that information really only pertains top they're *own* marriage, and they're frequently misinformed about that! Anyway, judging from watching my sister and Brother in law since I was 5 when they got married, I'd say simply that they're comfortable with each other and know each other so well. I remember when my sister came up to visit the family every year, I remember my brother-in-law initially looking like he was bored, and my sister did all the talking. I've since come to realized that he just didn't talk that much, and my sister would often answer for the two of them or finish his sentences.
 

Hornet3d

Wise
It's not that I disagree with you. I do believed that they're *very* informed on marriage. However, all that information really only pertains top they're *own* marriage, and they're frequently misinformed about that! Anyway, judging from watching my sister and Brother in law since I was 5 when they got married, I'd say simply that they're comfortable with each other and know each other so well. I remember when my sister came up to visit the family every year, I remember my brother-in-law initially looking like he was bored, and my sister did all the talking. I've since come to realized that he just didn't talk that much, and my sister would often answer for the two of them or finish his sentences.
I think after a while you get understand each others thought process I will often think of something a few seconds before my wife actually vocalises the same idea and it works the other way around as well. That does not mean this is 100%, quite the opposite, but then that is where surprises come from and discoveries made. Even after forty plus years we still often discover little things about each other that are new.
 

Terre

Renowned
As far as lasting marriages go what worked for my husband and myself was marrying our best friend. Each other. We'll have been married 34 years this upcoming Halloween. That doesn't seem to work for everyone though.
 

unreal

Noteworthy
It's not that I disagree with you. I do believed that they're *very* informed on marriage. However, all that information really only pertains top they're *own* marriage, and they're frequently misinformed about that! Anyway, judging from watching my sister and Brother in law since I was 5 when they got married, I'd say simply that they're comfortable with each other and know each other so well. I remember when my sister came up to visit the family every year, I remember my brother-in-law initially looking like he was bored, and my sister did all the talking. I've since come to realized that he just didn't talk that much, and my sister would often answer for the two of them or finish his sentences.
Well, I *agree* with you! :D

I've noticed (in my relatively short life), it's not about being (wrong) or right about something. It's what you do with that. Being right does not mean you won't screw up. In fact, it's the best setup for screwing things up. Because... well... "right", right?

The number of things I've been wrong about outnumber the number of things I've been right about (at last count, and counting). My luck in life is none of the things I've been wrong (or right) about have killed me. Or caused serious damage. Yet. And it has been luck.

Plus mad grammar school "dodge ball" skills.
 

unreal

Noteworthy
I think after a while you get understand each others thought process I will often think of something a few seconds before my wife actually vocalises the same idea and it works the other way around as well. That does not mean this is 100%, quite the opposite, but then that is where surprises come from and discoveries made. Even after forty plus years we still often discover little things about each other that are new.
I'm lucky in that my wife has come to the (usually right) conclusion that the first thing out of my mouth will be stupid (to some degree). So she safely tunes that out, and waits for the second thing. She long since gave up on me reliably "stifling the stupid". I'm assuming she came to the conclusion this was an easy compromise for her, and that, beyond the first thing I said, the rest was worth it. <gives self a high five>
 

Hornet3d

Wise
If you are lucky enough to find your soul mate you are clearly in with a head start but then best friends usually continue to grow together so at some point they possibly also become soul mates. I guess that depends on what your definition of sole mate is, in our case it means we feel comfortable together, we pick up on each others emotions, by and large we have the same vales and goals, we want each other to be happy, we have a lot to say to each other and communicate with ease, we can navigate different opinions and respect them, we respect each other, we love each other even at the worst moments and we both feel complete as individuals while together.
 

eclark1894

Visionary
We did the same thing. I think that's what gets us past the rocky times. Who dumps a best friend easily?
Well, to be honest, it depends on what your best friend did. My best friend found God and got saved. As a result he believed that he had to cut ties with his old life, which included me. It's funny to me because I actually thought I was one of the the more good influences in his life. Still, for his sake, I backed off. I'm still here if he ever needs me, though. And I've seen him from time to time. He's married and has at least one child.
 

Hornet3d

Wise
I have about two people who I regard as friends and a lot more who say they are friends but I only ever hear from them when they have computer problems, come to think of that I have a couple of family that are like that, and that was before covid.
 

eclark1894

Visionary
I was looking up some stuff in Wikipedia and I happened to run across this bit of information that kinda deals with what we've been talking about.
Marilyn McCoo and Billy Davis Jr. of the Fifth Dimension just celebrated their 52 Wedding Anniversary this year. Thought that was kind of interesting.
 

Hornet3d

Wise
I was looking up some stuff in Wikipedia and I happened to run across this bit of information that kinda deals with what we've been talking about.
Marilyn McCoo and Billy Davis Jr. of the Fifth Dimension just celebrated their 52 Wedding Anniversary this year. Thought that was kind of interesting.

A very rare Anniversary in an industry better known for break ups, some quite bitter.
 

Miss B

Drawing Life 1 Pixel at a Time
CV-BEE
I checked it out in Wikipedia as well, and they're not members of the current Fifth Dimension, so possibly quitting the group when they did (not sure when that was) may have saved their marriage.
 

eclark1894

Visionary
A very rare Anniversary in an industry better known for break ups, some quite bitter.
It did prompt me to do a little further digging on another famous duo. Nick Ashford and Valerie Simpson. Unfortunately, Ashford died about 10 years ago, but they were still married. If he were still alive it would have been 47 years. And then, there's Denzel Washington who's been married 38 years, and Michael J. Fox, who has been married for about 35 years. I suppose that's not that long, but then again, both actors are still in their 60s. I prefer to think that celebrities get a lot of bad press in a tabloid world.
 
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